How to Bounce Back from Life’s Curveballs (with Dr. Maya Shankar)
New episode of The Happiness Lab: “How to Bounce Back from Life’s Curveballs (with Dr. Maya Shankar)”
Life has a habit of disrupting things when we least expect it. This week on The Happiness Lab, I sit down with cognitive scientist and author Dr. Maya Shankar to explore how we can navigate these unexpected and even unwanted changes. Maya is the host of the podcast A Slight Change of Plans and the author of a new book called The Other Side of Change.
Maya’s insights about dealing with unexpected changes may just help you get unstuck in 2026.
When you witness someone’s extraordinary actions, it cracks open your imagination about what you are capable of. — Maya Shankar
How to Embrace Change
Recognize that change will change you—and that's empowering.
We tend to think we'll stay the same person through change. But change transforms our capabilities, our values, and even our identities—and recognizing this can help us see change as an opportunity for growth rather than a threat.
Expand your possible selves.
When we're stuck, we tend to limit our imagination about who we could become. We can expand our sense of possibility by looking to others who inspire us, exposing ourselves to new ideas and perspectives, and connecting with communities that share our evolving values.
Practice self-compassion when change feels hard.
Change often triggers self-blame and shame, especially if we have an internal locus of control (the belief that everything is within our power). Research by Kristin Neff and her colleagues has found that treating ourselves with the same kindness we'd show a friend is a powerful tool for helping us reduce our shame and get unstuck.
Take Action This Week: When you catch yourself resisting a change or feeling stuck, ask yourself: “Who might I become on the other side of this?” Instead of focusing on what you're losing, imagine the new capabilities, values, or parts of your identity that this change might reveal.
Coming Up Next Week…
What if you're stuck because you’re keeping score on the wrong game? Next week on The Happiness Lab, New York Times columnist David Brooks reveals why we optimize for "resume virtues" at the expense of the character traits that actually matter — and how to build eulogy virtues through community instead of achievement.
Looking for more?
You can find all our companion guides from this season of The Happiness Lab on DrLaurieSantos.com/Newsletter.
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